Under The Same Sky
by Neva
Summary: On a sleepless night, Utena considers the many faces of change, trust, and family. Set at the beginning of the Akio Arc.


**Disclaimer:** These characters are the property of Be-Papas and the brainchildren of Kunihiko Ikuhara and Chiho Saito.

**Dedication:** For Lily, always.

**Notes:** This takes place at the beginning of the third arc.

"Utena-_sama_? Can't you sleep?"

She's already woken up twice to the sound of a coffin lid slamming shut above her head, the scent of roses not comforting but sickening. It should have gotten old by now. It hasn't. That's the power of nightmares. 

This time, she could have sworn that the other side of the bed was empty... before she heard her friend speak.

"Yes." Utena rolls over on her back. "Maybe." Rolls over again, so that she's staring into Anthy's wide green eyes, and tries for a smile. "I'll get there."

"It's not unusual to have this much trouble settling down in a new place."

This is their third night in the Chairman's quarters, so it technically counts as a new place, doesn't it? "It's not the first time I've had to do that." Far from the first time, since the day that the gate to her parents' house shut behind her, leaving her to face the world outside - which then seemed like a terrifying, unconquerable wilderness - more or less on her own terms. "Himemiya? What do _you_ do when you can't settle down? Do you think the Chairman would mind if we sneaked down to the kitchen?" After all, what are roommates for, if not the occasional late-night cup of tea in between ritual battles for the fate of the world?

"_Utena-_sama_, let's do this together..."_

Battles fought with a new weapon, maybe even with new rules. She tries to remember what it felt like to have the sword drawn from inside her by the same slim brown hands that sketch and cook and tend to the roses in the greenhouse. She tries to remember, and can't quite find the words.

The Rose Bride's - no, _Anthy's_ - voice brings her back down to earth. "I'm not hungry right now. But please feel free. This is your house, too."

"He lets us wander around after lights-out?" Onto her back again.

"There aren't very many house rules. Mostly, he trusts our discretion."

"It must be nice to be treated like that," Utena observes. "Like an adult."

Anthy smiles. Without her glasses, with her dusky hair framing her face and roiling over her shoulders, it's an entirely different effect than during the day. "I'll always be his little sister. That's how it works."

"Even when he marries Kanae?"

"Even after that."

"That's..." _What?_ "...reassuring." And it is, in its way... reassuring to know that you'll always have a place to belong. Anthy's brother definitely falls into the "too good to be true" category, so why wouldn't it make sense that he would never cast his sister out? And why does Utena suddenly have chills, even under the blankets? "Himemiya?" she whispers. "You don't have to answer this, but... what happened to your parents? How'd you end up here?"

There's no answer. At first she thinks that Anthy is angry with her, but then realizes that her friend has fallen asleep herself in the space of a second. iI wish I could do that. How does she do that? /i

Just one more question, that.

If Utena walks up to the floor-to-ceiling window and looks out over the campus, she can see the dorm where she used to live, now a world away. She rests her head against the glass. Maybe, if not for... a lot of things, she'd still be there. Studying for tests, playing basketball, bingeing on sweets with Wakaba and giggling over the handsome faces dotting the campus. And looking back on these years fondly when it's all over. But things would be different in a way that she finds hard to imagine now. Things would be different in a way that she's not sure she iwants/I to imagine now.

Then again, maybe some changes are already here, and not just in their living arrangements.

_Let's do this together._

Day or night? comforting or terrifying? student or Rose Bride? As she makes her way back to the bed, what she sees before her in Anthy's tranquil face is all of these at once, wrapped up in one small, deceptively unassuming package.

There are still so many answers Utena doesn't have, but maybe she doesn't really need them now. For the first time, she doesn't care what led her to the top of this tower, with the stars just above the ceiling and the even breaths of a strange classmate (counterpointed by their pet) as her lullaby. She's starting to understand exactly who and what she's in danger of losing every time she makes her way through the gate, through the forest, toward the dueling arena. As she drifts off again, she thinks she feels Anthy's fingers closing around hers, and she's home.


End file.
